Trust is the true foundation of any strong relationship. Since this is the case, it can be easy to feel like a relationship is over when the trust is no longer present. While it is entirely possible that the trust you lost might never return, it is actually an outcome that you can control more than you might expect. If you and your partner want to continue to make the relationship work after a loss of trust; then you’re already heading in the right direction. In this article, you’ll discover the seven things to do when you lose trust in a relationship.
7 Things To Do When You Lose Trust In A Relationship
Choosing to continue to pursue and repair the relationship means that you’re both in it for the long haul which means you just need to focus on putting in the work. A lost trust will not fix itself as much as time heals old wounds. When there is a breach of trust in a relationship, it is an active process to earn it back, but it is far from impossible.
1. Start With Being Honest
When there is a breach of trust, it’s almost always because of some sort of deception or withheld information. Even if it isn’t, pretending that the trust is not lost will not fix the problems that you and your partner are having.
In order to recover from an incident or general decline where trust has been lost; you and your partner need to be completely honest with each other. You need to talk about why the trust was lost and really address the things that you have both been holding onto.
Discuss what happened and why. This will allow you to begin your healing process by providing the opportunity to clear the air. So being honest with each is the first thing to do when you lost trust in a relationship.
2. Be Willing To Give It Time
Trust does not get built easily or quickly, even when there is no reason for it to be gone in the first place. So this means that when there actually is a reason why you lose trust in your relationship. And it becomes apparent almost immediately that your relationship and both parties will need time to rebuild the trust.
There is a good chance that one of you will need to recover from guilt and another from pain. These are not feelings that can simply be waved away. It will take time and commitment for you both to heal, but your relationship is worth it, so stick to it.
3. Be On Your Best Behavior
In order for rebuild trust in a relationship, you will both need to enter a space where you’re willing to put in the extra effort for each other again. This means not continuously bringing the indiscretion up in every fight; for the other person means being respectful of the fact that they did something that caused this loss of trust.
While you’re both healing, recovering, and growing, you need to commit to being kind and gentle with one another. Don’t be fake, but do remember that the intent of working to fix this issue is to make it better and not worse.
4. Allow Yourself To Move Past It
This is one of the critical things to do when you lost trust in a relationship. I know, this might look different for both parties involved. But it is equally important for the person who made the mistake and the person who is trying to forgive them. If you have the mindset that you are never going to make it up to them.
Or they have the mindset that you can never make it up to them, you are both setting yourselves up to fail. You don’t have to move past it on the first day; but eventually, you will need to stop living with the shadow of these problems looming over the relationship.
5. Remember That Your Relationship Is Worth The Effort
If you didn’t both believe that putting in the hard work to bring your relationship back up and regrow your trust was worth it; then you wouldn’t be here. You’ve already decided that you have something worth saving, even if it isn’t easy; but it’s important to make sure you remember why.
Go to nice dinners or spend time together at night. Doing little things that remind you why you got together in the first place can keep you motivated in your commitment to rebuilding that trust.
6. Choose Your Battles
When the trust is lost in a relationship, it becomes very easy to turn everything into a fight. It’s easy to make everything feel accusatory or deceptive or problematic. If you let that happen, it will become very difficult to maintain your relationship and move past the problems that you had.
When you’re both in such a delicate place with your relationship, make sure to avoid picking fights that aren’t actually about anything more than that existing pain.
7. Communication is Key
The only way that you will ever regain the trust lost in your relationship is through open and honest communication. That doesn’t mean you talk about it when you decide to work it out. And after that, you never talk about it again. Instead, as you both grow and move towards this new future, it is imperative to stay in constant communication.
Let each other know when something doesn’t feel right. Don’t be accusatory and don’t be hurtful. Take the time to truly talk to each other through where you’re at each and every day. These check-ins will help you both stay in touch. Try to avoid potential problems, and will keep you both committed to the same goal.
In a loving relationship, a loss of trust can feel like the end of the world. It can make you question whether or not you could ever salvage any part of the beautiful thing that you once shared.
Fortunately, as long as you’re willing to work on it together; your chances of making it through this are actually quite good. Rebuilding trust in a relationship is built around commitment, love, and forgiveness.
These are important values in any relationship. And you will without question come out stronger on the other side as long as you both fight for it in the end.
If you have already decided that you want to do what it takes; then grit your teeth and be thankful! As someone you love so dearly is there to help you through it all. The rest will fall into place.
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