A lot of times we catch ourselves fantasizing about being in a relationship. And what it should be like being with the perfect person? We question ourselves as to why we actually are still single. We can find ourselves in the midst of couples, and we realize that we are the only single people there. At times like that we get asked why we are still single and then we, in turn, ask ourselves the same question. Why are we still single? And what are the real reasons why you are still single? Let us take a look and try to find out.
Three Real Reasons You Are Still Single
1. You are Still Healing
Many times we may decide to be single because we need to be. If you have ever been in a relationship that hurt, you would know what I am talking about. It is not easy going from one hurt and committing yourself and your emotions to another person.
If the fragments of the previous hurt still linger, it would be difficult to get yourself invested in a new relationship. When you are hurting, you are in no capacity to give yourself wholly to another person. There are just too many broken pieces of you lying about that need to first be put back together. Learn more on how to heal a broken heart here.
There are several underlying effects of being previously hurt which may take its toll and they include:
1). Low Self-Esteem:
This can result from a previously abusive relationship, and it messes with one’s self-image. A person with a low sense of self-esteem cannot be themselves, they are always a watered down version of themselves. And this can greatly affect the type of people they attract into their lives.
2). Lack of Trust:
Coming from a place of hurt, it may be very difficult to get yourself to trust people again. When you lack trust, you would second guess everything someone says to you and in the process, push people away.
3). Fear of Getting Hurt:
If you have been hurt before, you know that the fear of getting hurt again is very real. No one wants to go through that a second time. Because of this, we may tend to avoid relationships all together just to be safe.
Taking out the time to be single in order to heal from any past hurt may be the reason some of us are still single, and this is not a bad thing. Healing for different people comes in different ways and can take different amounts of time.
2. You Have Been Single for Too Long
Yes, there is such a thing as being single for too long. Most times we do not even notice that it is happening, we just find that we have been single for as long as we can remember. And we are still single with no valid reason as to why.
Many times, we start out being single with the intention of trying to rediscover who we are, trying to heal or quite simply trying to grow into a better version of ourselves; but, as it may happen, we can find ourselves still single after a very long time with simply no intentions of even trying to get back on track.
And this can result from being so self-sufficient that we do not see the point of a relationship anymore. It can be hard to detect at first, and we could even go as far as denying it vehemently; however, the truth remains that you are still single because you have been single for too long.
You enjoy your personal space and solitude a little bit too much for your own good. At this point, it may just be time to get out the trusty old dating handbook, a dust-up that outfit at the back of your closet, get out there and mingle.
3. You Are Not Attracting the Right People
Having the right one usually starts with attracting the right one and many times, we tend not to attract the kind of people we would be inclined to dating. This usually begins with who we are as individuals.
As humans, we tend to attract the kind of people we are to ourselves. Knowing the kind of person that you are would help you to know the kind of people you attract. We attract people every day, but we know for a fact that not everyone that we attract is someone we can potentially date.
We simply just do not see ourselves with these people and the people we do see ourselves dating, are the people we usually do not attract. To change your attraction crowd, simply become the version of yourself that you would want to date.
We could also just be waiting for that wow effect with a person. Literally for someone to come to sweep us off of our feet. At this point, any other person would pale in comparison to this image we have in our heads. We tend to look for Mr. Right forgetting that people are not perfect. Read more on Manifesting Love: A 7-Step Guide You Should Follow here.
Being single is not a disease or a crime but knowing the real reason why you are still single may just help you get out of your funk and get back into the dating scene. If you are going through a healing process, it is important to take your time and heal properly.
If you are not attracting the quality men, you may want to take some time and do some self-evaluation. Find out who you are and who you attract and simply be who you would like to attract. However, if you are still single because you have been single for too long, you may want to shake off that laziness towards dating.
We would all love to have someone blow us away and rock our worlds; however, being in the imperfect world that we are, we most likely would not get swept off in the way we expect. We should simply just leave ourselves open to the possibility and not be completely shut off.
Do you like this article of The Real Reason You Are Still Single? If you are still single, read this article more often and find your way to get your ideal man. Also, don’t hesitate to share this post with as many people as possible! 💪💪💖💖