Before you even start writing your attractive dating profile, you should consider exactly what and who you are looking for. Do you want a casual relationship to fill your time until you move out of state? Or are you searching for the person you want to spend the rest of your life with? The answer you choose should be one that YOU want and not your girlfriends, mother or sisters pressure you in to.
Online Dating – What Are You Looking For
Let go of the fear that it’s too late to meet any good man. And don’t worry about the time you are investing in healing yourself now, as it is necessary! I am sure that you will be grateful later.
After you recover from a breakup and ready to embrace your future, then it is time to start thinking about what you are looking for when it comes to dating. After defining what you are looking for then you should think about whom you are looking for.
Given the chance, most people will list physical attributes – like beauty, build and finances, etc. Instead of character traits – such as honesty, forgiving, merciful, compassion and understanding.
If you focus on looking for physical attributes, you’d better be drop dead beautiful yourself and be willing to settle for someone who might be superficial. On the other hand, if you are willing to consider people who may not initially turn your head, you could find a real gem.
In the dating arena and romance, you need to have a good understanding of giving and taking. And the great traits like small gestures, forgiveness will help to develop a deep connection and love for each other. The benefits of what’s on the surface will quickly fade after your first argument or disagreement.
I would highly recommend you to spend some time to dig deeper within yourself. What are you looking for? Also, it’s a practical approach to write down some goals for your journey and parameters for what is and is not acceptable.
Answer these questions for yourself:
- “What kind of man do I want?”
- “How do I perceive my future—do children play a role?”
- “What does a relationship mean to me personally? Is it caring, friendship, passion, being physical or mental compatibility?”
- What do you seek in a mate? Is it, humor, loyalty, fairness, respect, warmth, intelligence, kindness, integrity, honesty, tenderness, pride, chivalry?
- Can they smoke or drink?
- What are the top five things I dislike in a person?
- What are the top five things I find pleasing and attractive?
- Do I want a single person or will I accept one who has been in past relationships—divorced/widowed?
- What kind of profession should they be in?
You should create your ideal partner’s profile based on the answers to the above questions as a reference. Then you can use it to compare the profile you read online with. It will drastically help to narrow down the choices. Therefore, you’ll know how to distinguish between Mr. or Ms. Right and Mr. or Ms. Wrong.
Also, you can take the below facts according to experts as a reference:
1. A man who drinks heavily, likely is a loud and manner-less man. A good man would be well mannered and considerate and limit his drinking. He would not brag about bar hopping, drinking buddies, or bouts. He would never drink and drive a date home.
2. A person who only talks about him or self without caring about your feeling is a selfish, self-obsessed person. I believe you won’t be thrilled when dealing with this kind of person.
3. A person who is serious about dating and wishes to further the relationship will try and find out as much as they can about you. They will share essential aspects of their life with you, and try and give insights into their likes or dislikes, hopes as well as aspirations.
4. The wrong kind will still flirt with other people while sitting with you. They never give you 100% attention, they always look around and speak about how they find ‘x’ lovely or ‘y’ a turn on. And this is a warning sign that he won’t treat you as a priority. The ideal person will not flirt unless they know you well; they will never pass lewd remarks, or make passes, or advertise conquests.
5. The wrong kind is flashy and will flaunt their money as well as wealth or position. Especially, if they are good looking and has a good physique they will be obsessed with it –constantly glance in mirrors or checking their appearance. Isn’t one of the signs of a narcissist?
6. A quality person will be interested in more than a physical relationship—they will try and understand what makes you tick and find out whether the two of you have any common grounds. Read more on 13 Ways To Spot A Guy Who Only Wants You For That One Reason
Besides knowing what you are looking for, it’s also vital that you should intentionally avoid dealing with the certain traits of people.
It’s crucial to watch out for people who:
- Lie to you, signs that you are dating a liar
- Pressure you to meet them immediately
- Are persistent about finding out personal information but do not reveal anything about themselves
- Do not give accurate information about their age, marital status, having children, profession and so on
- Who does not want to speak on the phone
- Become a nuisance and harass you to speed things up
Read more on 10 Best Online Dating Tips for Women
Online dating can be fun and exciting, and it is also an excellent opportunity for you to meet your soulmate if you know what you are looking for. Therefore it’s critical for you to understand what you’re looking for in a relationship and your partner. Don’t hesitate to start answering the above questions; I am confident that you will have a clear picture.
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